It’s now been a week since I took a leap of faith and handed in my notice. At the time I was a mixture of terrified and excited but now every last shred of doubt had left me and I’m ready to move on.
I’m already a much happier person, Leo has commented that as soon as I handed in my notice I had a spring in my step. I can’t believe just how miserable that place had made me and how long it took me to be able to admit it. On top of that I can’t believe how miserable other people are too. The amount of colleagues who have come forward about being just as unhappy and feeling just as trapped is staggering. While I’m touched that so many people have read my blog and are getting strength from it I’m really saddened so many people are so unhappy.
It’s abundantly clear (and it has been for a long time) how bad the atmosphere is in my team/department and how disconnected the ‘powers that be’ are from reality. It’s profit over people every step of the way, as long as a profit is being made it doesn’t matter how many people and broken to get there. I truly hope that the people who aren’t happy (as some people love their job there) see that they aren’t trapped, there is an escape, they don’t have to stay unhappy and there is a job out there for you where you’ll be appreciated and respected.
Because of all this getting through four weeks of notice is proving to be difficult. No matter how positive I try to be, no matter how much I try and tell myself it’s only four weeks I just can’t face being there anymore. I’ve spent over four years there so why is four weeks so impossible? Is it because I know I don’t have to be there anymore or is it because they have squeezed every last drop out of me and I simply have nothing left to give?
Regardless of the reason I can’t wait to be free of the horrible anxiety I get on the way to work and the splitting headaches I get on the way home from the sheer concentration of having to be OK all day. I just can’t wait to be free.